One Button Illusion

Marlock - Newspaper from Croatia -

Published in Croatia - Political debates and analysis - 12 Feb 2016 06:41 - 20

http://s24.postimg.org/yszuld51x/rsz_1escape_key.png
One Button Illusion | Day 33 | Issue 7


Dear citizens of the deleted countries and everyone else,

Are you looking for a new home? Is your home nation conquered by a bully neighbor, or simply to small to be functional (ie, Austria, see the final address of the Austrian CP; or, the Norwegian example)? Are you just sick and tired of not being able to earn a proper wage, or fight in a war?

Why not moving to Croatia instead? Read below for more!!


In other news, let's take a look at the last few days' international press and discern what the quality reading had to offer.

I hope you enjoy the read!



http://www.auplod.com/u/oldapu71a11.png http://www.auplod.com/u/oldapu71a11.png
Croatia - Your New Home

So, you are either:
    deleted from the map
    bored
    broke
    or in any other state where you don't know where and how to proceed

There ain't that many active citizens in your current country? You can not find workers? You can not find a well paid job? You would like to invest that hard earned gold, but you are not quite sure that the current location is the best place?

Well... allow me to introduce.... CROATIA :)

http://s9.postimg.org/ov1q309kr/hr_zastava_u_obliku_srca.jpghttp://s9.postimg.org/ov1q309kr/hr_zastava_u_obliku_srca.jpghttp://s9.postimg.org/ov1q309kr/hr_zastava_u_obliku_srca.jpghttp://s9.postimg.org/ov1q309kr/hr_zastava_u_obliku_srca.jpghttp://s9.postimg.org/ov1q309kr/hr_zastava_u_obliku_srca.jpghttp://s9.postimg.org/ov1q309kr/hr_zastava_u_obliku_srca.jpghttp://s9.postimg.org/ov1q309kr/hr_zastava_u_obliku_srca.jpg


Things you need to know from the out-start:


1. Our CP is a family loving man:

http://s28.postimg.org/pe0m2rgrh/slika_9.jpg


2. If you check the Croatian Economy tab, you will see that at this point we almost have all the resources' bonuses. In less than a week, we will have all of them, due to an arrangement with our Italian Ally. SO,
100% BONUSES on the production. A perfect place to start a business!!


3. The Serbian Army, getting ready to sign the capitulation, has made a small gesture of future friendship by showing how much they appreciate the Croatian move into Serbia, to help modernize the nation, provide medical istance, and bring laughter to the faces of Serbian women:


http://s12.postimg.org/l68l1x8ql/Slika_10.jpg



4. If you move as an individual, you will be greeting by the friendly folks at the Croatian official IRC Channel: #CroRevollution, and if you are moving in as a whole group, please write to our Minister for Foregin Groups and Minorities, his Toiletness, Mrs. BorKhan

http://s13.postimg.org/9j8prfwwn/slika_11.jpg




Join us, the Croatian community will happily greet you!!



http://s9.postimg.org/agbd8eifv/rsz_1.gifhttp://s9.postimg.org/agbd8eifv/rsz_1.gifhttp://s9.postimg.org/agbd8eifv/rsz_1.gifhttp://s9.postimg.org/agbd8eifv/rsz_1.gifhttp://s9.postimg.org/agbd8eifv/rsz_1.gifhttp://s9.postimg.org/agbd8eifv/rsz_1.gifhttp://s9.postimg.org/agbd8eifv/rsz_1.gifhttp://s9.postimg.org/agbd8eifv/rsz_1.gifhttp://s9.postimg.org/agbd8eifv/rsz_1.gifhttp://s9.postimg.org/agbd8eifv/rsz_1.gifhttp://s9.postimg.org/agbd8eifv/rsz_1.gifhttp://s9.postimg.org/agbd8eifv/rsz_1.gifhttp://s9.postimg.org/agbd8eifv/rsz_1.gifhttp://s9.postimg.org/agbd8eifv/rsz_1.gifhttp://s9.postimg.org/agbd8eifv/rsz_1.gifhttp://s9.postimg.org/agbd8eifv/rsz_1.gifhttp://s9.postimg.org/agbd8eifv/rsz_1.gif
The Balkan Front Cuming to an End... GRAND FINALE

In addition, the Balkan front will soon be closed, with the upcoming deletion of Serbia.

With the prior approval from the EAGLE HQ and Croatian, Bosnian and Turkish MoD's, I am disclosing the end-game military plan of subduing Serbia into Servia.


Phase 1: THE LATINICA OFFENSIVE

The first strike is to be made on the left flank, from Western Serbia, were, as we speak, Serbian women are greeting the Croatian liberators with flowers and kisses. The attack aims to quickly blitz through the weak WW1 Serbian artillery defenses, circle the Serbian lines with tanks, and squeeze them into a pleasant surrender.

http://s22.postimg.org/666pw6bgh/slika_2.jpg


Phase 2: THE KEBAB OFFENSIVE

With the disarray within Serbian forces mounting up to oblivion, the Turks will invade from the East, with full cooperation of the Bulgarians who have already committed themselves to the EAGLE Alliance through a covert "non-existence-on-the-map" method. The main goal of the Turkish armed forces (also read this article for other auxiliary goals), after having captured the Serbian Eastern Armies HQ, is to explain to the Serbian military leadership why wearing a mustache is an important element for the modern erevollution army. This is expected to demoralize the Serbian forces to the extent that they will question their ability to subdue their women and enemies alike.

http://s22.postimg.org/hjt97dlz5/slika_3.jpg


Phase 3: THE BOSNIAN INCEPTION

Finally, as the Serbian west and east fronts have collapsed, and with the majority of Serbian soldiers growing mustaches, the Bosnian Army will meet little resistance in their final push straight through Serbia, in order to secure that sea fish resource in Belgrade.

What follows is an eruption of joy and happiness among the former belligerents.

http://s22.postimg.org/fgitzpm69/slika_4.jpg

http://s13.postimg.org/mf1nj48g7/slika_1.jpg

http://s9.postimg.org/agbd8eifv/rsz_1.gifhttp://s9.postimg.org/agbd8eifv/rsz_1.gifhttp://s9.postimg.org/agbd8eifv/rsz_1.gifhttp://s9.postimg.org/agbd8eifv/rsz_1.gifhttp://s9.postimg.org/agbd8eifv/rsz_1.gifhttp://s9.postimg.org/agbd8eifv/rsz_1.gifhttp://s9.postimg.org/agbd8eifv/rsz_1.gifhttp://s9.postimg.org/agbd8eifv/rsz_1.gifhttp://s9.postimg.org/agbd8eifv/rsz_1.gifhttp://s9.postimg.org/agbd8eifv/rsz_1.gifhttp://s9.postimg.org/agbd8eifv/rsz_1.gifhttp://s9.postimg.org/agbd8eifv/rsz_1.gifhttp://s9.postimg.org/agbd8eifv/rsz_1.gifhttp://s9.postimg.org/agbd8eifv/rsz_1.gifhttp://s9.postimg.org/agbd8eifv/rsz_1.gifhttp://s9.postimg.org/agbd8eifv/rsz_1.gifhttp://s9.postimg.org/agbd8eifv/rsz_1.gif

Quality Press


Before I begin, I'd like to point out to the creation of a player-based wikipedia for eRevollution. Feel like contributing? Visit the Portal, and give support to the author.

http://s21.postimg.org/pv40fopuv/slika_6.jpg

Gameplay

An excellent company production calculator.
Boosting and cheating - two sides of a same coin?
Proper punishment for cheaters - ideas by Jimmy86.
Have you missed reading the erev leaks
? If so, check the article and the comments below, and think about it.

Game Mechanics

Terrorist and Rebels? WTF or FY? Decide on your own.
A set of proposals and ideas with regard the game mechanics - fresh and innovative, well done, a must-read!!
Another excellent set of ideas with regard the game mechanics - again, well done!
A very interesting set of ideas with regard the player cles. A good thing that the player is not coming from India :P :P (was this politically incorrect? are we allowed to be politically incorrect?)
Another proposal, with regard the general state of game transparency.

Analysis

Statistical information with regard the Baltic Treaty.
A solid national plan for the up-coming period (Brasil).
A solid national development plan (Turkey).
A very detailed national plan (Ukraine, Ministry of Economy).
Another one from Ukraine, on how to give gold loans to citizens and what's it all about.
A short and clear US report on national activities.
The New Argentinian Deal.
Global national treasury and ranking analysis - an excellent short overview.
A simply fantastic geopolitical early-game analysis by a Hungarian journalist - a must read, even if the google translate does not give it a full credit.
An excellent Balkan geopolitical analysis by another Hungarian journalist - both of them provide an excellent read, and I hope that will consider writing in English too
Another excellent and well written geopolitical analysis of the Balkan wars, this time in English - and guess what?; the author is also Hungarian. HUNGARIANS, YOU ROCK IN JOURNALISM!!! :)


Politics

A good example of a public treaty - here, France and Spain have committed themselves to end the hostilities and sign an agreement that is to shape the geography mid and south-western Europe in the time to come.
South America on a brink of a devastating war?? Who will join the fight? Who will support who? Where is Batman!!??
Irish-Candi Empire - a myth or reality? Are they coming for us???
A short interview with the Japanese CP who is thankful to the fact that Japan is not in the Balkans :)

Trolling


http://s11.postimg.org/penpy1bar/slika_7.jpg
Read all about NEXUS and WALDO in the new exciting board game "this is f.. boring" HERE.

See if you can detect Kylo in every single article written by the same author.
Not really trolling, but equaly sad: something is sad in the State of Pakistan.


The chocolate is going to GET LICKED!!!
http://s14.postimg.org/544fzp16p/slika_8.jpg
This above is actually a very serious article written by the Italian CP, "super" Mario, who is trying to motivate the remaining 3 of his citizens to join him in a fight against two Swiss two-clickers. the Mid-Europe is about to erupt in a chocolate delight! I wonder how many BH hunters will smell that fine taste of choko!!! However, I would have preferred to see the outcome of the fight fought only between the opposing sides. Imagine that, the Italian Army against the Papal Guards. Go figure.



Finally, the unforgiving Samurai:

http://s29.postimg.org/w8ze9ub6f/slika_5.jpg


http://www.auplod.com/u/oldapu71a11.png http://www.auplod.com/u/oldapu71a11.png

Tnx for reading!

Hope to see you in the next issue too!


http://s2.postimg.org/m4v337hx5/thankyoumario.gif

Support

MudaOdLabudaIvanCRODjubreMuckoPeroKillerDelBoy

Comments (20)

ahahahahah vote ! keep going Laugh
Thanks! o7
Laugh
Croatia is dying country , who it right mind want to live there !
Hahaha Laugh man you are crazy o/
nice
great stuff! Smile
hik?
We actually do not like Croatia, only your womans Smile We are coming for them in next few days. Dont lie to people's, your resources are gonna melt like snow in March Smile Brace yourselves, Serbia is coming Laugh Laugh Laugh
o/
2 - 0 Smile Jaki ste na riječima samo Wink Nastavite sa prozivkama Smile
o7
u eRepu bar drzite neki dmg ovde ni to.. a srbiji sami vi mozete samo da obrisete dolnji deo ledja. Vec mesec dana brisete, a i ide vam Smile
Poceo si da pises SF romane, kao i u RL i ovde ste p.ck. koje se kriju iza rolne toalet papira
ne kaze se dzabe "sto je babi milo to joj se i snilo"
hahaha V+
Старо хрватско писмо
I'm a Croat, but I'm not in the article...shame on you hahahahha Laugh
Slava hrvatska xD
Obi Van regard you so much lol Laugh